hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Randomize
