I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
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