where does the pee come out of this thing
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
