Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
