I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
