There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
