North Korea, Best Korea!
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Randomize