The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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