The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
