i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
