Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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