You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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