it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
All I want is dick and wine.
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