I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
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