is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
