this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
As shirtless as possible
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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