sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
