on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
