yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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