it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
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