We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
