This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
