OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Randomize
