everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Randomize
