she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Randomize
