ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Randomize
