Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I should be sponsored by Trojan
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
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