at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
