you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
