I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize