11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Randomize
