Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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