Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize
