everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Randomize
