I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
im holly from the hills drunk
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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