I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize
