i wish starbucks made bloody marys
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
