I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
