I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize
