Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize