I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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