ugly people sure do ruin things
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
