yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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