Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
