Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
