that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
