Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
found the other keg... it's in the tree
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
