Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
