I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I can tuck mytits in my pants
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Randomize
