I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Randomize
